From the tender age of five, the hymns and liturgy of the Methodist church were the soundtrack to my life. I vividly recall sitting beside my mother, joining in the familiar words of the Lord’s Prayer, a testament to the deep roots already forming within me in “the people called Methodists.” My upbringing in our small United Methodist church is filled with cherished memories. The warmth of Christmas services, decorating with Chrismons, the glow of Advent candles, waving palm branches on Palm Sunday, and the triumphant songs of Easter – these were the rhythms of my childhood.
Sunday school, Vacation Bible School, and even the coveted lead role in the Christmas musical at eight years old were all integral parts of my early faith formation. As I grew, so did my involvement. Fifth grade brought “Sonshine” camp, sixth grade confirmation and baptism, and by seventh grade, I was active in youth group mission trips. The Methodist Church wasn’t just imparting beliefs; it was teaching why we believed. The emphasis on tradition, reason, and personal experience as lenses through which to understand scripture resonated deeply with my analytical mind. This intellectual approach, where faith and science were not adversaries but allies, celebrating and validating each other, was crucial for a child seeking understanding and rationale.
My musical talents, which blossomed into my profession, were nurtured within the church walls. Choir practices, handbell ensembles, piano recitals by my church member teacher – the sanctuary was a second home. The hymnal became my first music theory textbook. By eighth grade, I stood before a packed church on Christmas Eve, singing my first solo – a tradition I continued for a decade.
The United Methodist Church remained a constant and central presence as I navigated adolescence and adulthood. My passion for church music led me to direct choirs and handbell groups, working with individuals from toddlers to nonagenarians. The church even played matchmaker, as I met my husband through a United Methodist campus ministry. For sixteen years, I’ve been a United Methodist clergy spouse, our children welcomed into the nurseries, Sunday schools, and pews of numerous United Methodist congregations.
To say I am deeply Methodist is an understatement. Among lifelong members, my connection is profound. Just ask my Baptist friends! Yet, this lifelong immersion, these golden memories, the profound personal bonds, my respect for the Wesleyan quadrilateral, my dedication to scriptural study, and my unwavering loyalty to the United Methodist denomination – none of it could withstand a truth that gradually emerged and then forcefully struck my heart: the United Methodist denomination of my upbringing no longer exists. Much of what remains has diverged from my traditional theological understanding.
The question for me, and for many orthodox United Methodists, isn’t simply about staying or leaving. It’s about acknowledging that we have, in essence, been displaced by an institution that has shifted its theological foundations. It’s about deciding what compromises we are willing to make moving forward: our membership in this institution, or our deeply held, scripture-based beliefs.
Four years ago, I vehemently resisted this realization. Identifying as a centrist, I held steadfast to my loyalty to the institution of The United Methodist Church. I witnessed the growing divisions, heard the escalating debates, but couldn’t envision my faith outside this long-cherished institution. In retrospect, I may have even elevated the denomination to an idol, my devotion misdirected.
The pivotal moment arrived with the special session of the General Conference in 2019. Observing the proceedings online and the reactions across social media from self-proclaimed progressive and centrist Methodists was deeply unsettling. It forced me to confront the true nature of the situation and what was truly at stake for “the people called Methodist.” A powerful conviction took hold: this conflict extended far beyond the immediate issue of human sexuality. Ultimately, it was a battle for the very soul of the church, a decision of which altar we would serve – the institution itself, or the Kingdom of God.
The blatant disregard and open defiance of the clearly articulated teachings within our Book of Discipline have become undeniable. Countless accounts detail this erosion of doctrine. The reality is that a ruling minority, those occupying positions of leadership within the denomination, are misaligned with the theological convictions of the congregational majority. This explains the persistent tolerance of open defiance to our established social and theological doctrines, while traditional Methodists who voice concerns are met with threats and punitive measures. Denominational leadership is selectively enforcing aspects of our doctrine and discipline, prioritizing institutional preservation over historic Christian beliefs. It’s a system of “rules for thee and not for me.”
And those who dare to question this direction often face repercussions. I could share numerous distressing instances of hostility directed towards my traditional clergy family by progressive leaders within the United Methodist institution. Suffice it to say, as a traditional clergy household, we have been navigating a climate of apprehension for the past three years.
But amidst this denominational upheaval, there is Good News: Jesus Christ remains Lord. This truth is immutable.
And for my fellow cradle Methodists, and for United Methodists worldwide grappling with the uncertainty of what lies ahead, I offer this good news: meaningful and impactful ministry thrives beyond the confines of The United Methodist Church institution. My prayers, presence, gifts, service, and witness will not diminish outside of this denomination. Our primary allegiance is to Christ’s Holy Church. All ministry within it MUST be for the glory and in the name of Jesus Christ – not for the sake of Methodism, John Wesley, intellectualism, politics, or even social justice. It must begin and end with unwavering devotion to the one and only Truth, the one and only Light, the one and only Life. This is the path forward.
Our mission remains unchanged, yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Our capacity to fulfill that mission is not dictated by membership in any earthly institution, but by our belonging to the body of Christ.
The future beyond The United Methodist Church remains uncertain for me. I may find a home in another form of Methodist expression, perhaps within the Global Methodist Church or another Wesleyan denomination. But for my family and me, our commitment is clear: we will serve the Lord. And even if we are no longer identified as United Methodist, it is of paramount importance that we are known as “faithful.”
Mindy Dennison is a lifelong United Methodist and, along with her husband and three children, is active at Asbury Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Mindy is an entrepreneur and small business owner, formerly a public school teacher.
