Suicide is a global tragedy, claiming a life approximately every 40 seconds worldwide. In the U.S., it ranks as the 10th leading cause of death, affecting individuals across all demographics. The recent losses of prominent figures like Anthony Bourdain, Kate Spade, and Robin Williams have brought the question to the forefront once again: Why Do People Kill Themselves? What drives someone to take their own life?
Psychologist Jesse Bering, author of “Suicidal: Why We Kill Ourselves,” emphasizes the highly individual nature of suicide. The pathways leading someone to this point are as unique as their DNA, a complex web of personal experiences and circumstances. While depression is often associated with suicide, it’s crucial to understand that it’s not the sole cause, and most individuals with depression do not attempt suicide. Genetics can play a significant role, accounting for around 43% of the variability in suicidal behavior, while environmental factors contribute the remaining 57%. This interplay suggests that a genetic predisposition combined with challenging life events can erode a person’s will to live, leading them to seek an end to their pain.
A thoughtful person representing the complex emotions and internal struggles often associated with suicidal thoughts. Understanding why people consider suicide is crucial for prevention and support.
The Role of Social Pressures and Fear of Judgment
Bering highlights the significant impact of social factors in suicide. He argues that in many cases, suicide is driven by interpersonal issues, particularly an intense preoccupation with others’ perceptions. The fear of judgment, shame, and the agonizing concern about what others might think if they knew perceived “unpalatable truths” can fuel a destructive internal fire. Individuals may feel trapped by social anxieties and a fear of exposure, leading to a sense of isolation and hopelessness. This social pain can become unbearable, pushing someone to consider suicide as the only escape.
Misattributing Mental States and the Path to Recovery
Understanding the internal cognitive processes associated with suicidal thoughts is incredibly challenging. Even those experiencing suicidal ideation may struggle to pinpoint the exact reasons or predict when thoughts might turn into action. Psychiatrist Ralph Lewis points out a common “attributional error” where individuals misinterpret the causes of their mental states. For example, someone experiencing depression might believe their feelings stem from an existential crisis or a relationship issue, when the root cause could be a neurochemical imbalance.
Lewis notes that in his practice, antidepressant medication has often resolved these perceived existential crises, highlighting the biological underpinnings of some depressive and suicidal thoughts. He uses the analogy of attributing irritability to someone’s words when it’s actually due to hunger or fatigue. Survivors of suicide attempts often express confusion about their actions, stating, “I don’t know what came over me,” or “I don’t know what I was thinking.” This underscores the critical importance of suicide prevention. While someone may be convinced that life is not worth living in a moment of crisis, their perspective can drastically change in the following months. This shift can be due to medication, altered circumstances, or simply a “mysterious change of mind.”
Seeking Help and Finding Hope
If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, please remember that you are not alone and help is available. Reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255, or connect with a trusted family member or friend. It’s crucial to remember that feelings of hopelessness and despair can be temporary. Give yourself time and allow for the possibility of a “change of mind.” With support and professional help, it is possible to navigate through these dark times and rediscover a desire for life. Understanding why people kill themselves is the first step towards prevention, offering compassion, and fostering hope for those struggling with suicidal ideation.
