Growing up as a Catholic, devotion to Mary, the Mother of God, was deeply ingrained in my life. From receiving a Miraculous Medal at baptism to my first rosary beads at First Communion, the Hail Mary was a constant prayer, and Marian feast days were always observed. Mary was, and is, central to my faith.
Because of this upbringing, I naturally assumed Mary’s importance was universal among all Christians. It wasn’t until I was in my twenties, speaking with a friend who was converting to Catholicism, that I realized many non-Catholics find the Catholic Church’s emphasis on Mary unsettling. He shared that Mary was the biggest hurdle for him in embracing Catholicism fully.
This revelation was surprising. It was hard to grasp how honoring Mary could be misinterpreted as worshipping someone other than God.
Seeking deeper understanding, I began Fr. Michael Gaitley’s 33 Days to Morning Glory, a retreat preparing for Marian consecration. Suddenly, the source of discomfort became clearer. St. Louis de Montfort’s teachings on consecration emphasize giving ourselves entirely to Our Lady – body, soul, possessions, and spiritual goods.
This sounded extreme, even to me. No wonder some perceive Catholics as worshipping Mary!
Initial panic arose: “Why would I do that? Shouldn’t everything be given to God? Is this elevating Mary above God?” These questions raced through my mind until I continued reading and grasped the crucial point: the ultimate aim is to belong entirely to Jesus through Mary. This changed everything.
Yet, the question remained: if the goal is Jesus, why not go directly to Him? Why the emphasis on Mary’s intercession?
To Jesus Through Mary: Intercession, Not Idolatry
Catholics do not worship Mary. Instead, they venerate her and seek her intercession. It’s more accurate to say we pray with Mary, asking her to join us in prayer and intercede on our behalf. St. Louis de Montfort beautifully illustrates Mary’s role with an analogy of a peasant seeking the king’s favor:
It is as if a peasant, wishing to gain the friendship and benevolence of the king, went to the queen and presented her with a fruit which was his whole revenue, in order that she might present it to the king. The queen, having accepted the poor little offering from the peasant, would place the fruit on a large and beautiful dish of gold, and so, on the peasant’s behalf, would present it to the king. Then the fruit, however unworthy in itself to be a king’s present, would become worthy of his majesty because of the dish of gold on which it rested and the person who presented it.
In this analogy, we are the peasant – imperfect and sinful – desiring God’s grace. Mary, the Queen of Heaven, lovingly receives our flawed prayers, purifying and beautifying them, presenting them to Jesus, our King, on a “dish of gold.” She enhances our prayers, making them more acceptable to God.
Alt text: Painting depicting Virgin Mary as Queen of Heaven with crown and angels, symbolizing her elevated status in Catholicism.
Honoring the Mother Jesus Gave Us
From the cross, Jesus Himself entrusted Mary to us. “When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to his mother, ‘Woman, behold, your son!’ Then he said to the disciple, ‘Behold, your mother!’ And from that hour the disciple took her into his own home” (John 19:26-27). In this profound moment, Jesus gave Mary to be our spiritual mother.
Catholics honor Mary not only because she is our mother in faith, but because God Himself honored her. From all women, God chose Mary to be the vessel through which His Son entered the world. Mary’s unwavering “yes” to God made her instrumental in God’s plan for salvation. The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC 144) highlights her as the “perfect embodiment of the obedience of faith” from conception to the foot of the cross. This exceptional role is why Catholics hold Mary in such high esteem.
Alt text: Religious painting portraying the Virgin Mary and Saint John grieving at the foot of the cross during the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ.
Embrace Love for Mary Without Fear
St. Maximilian Kolbe encouraged a deep love for Mary:
“Never be afraid of loving the Blessed Virgin Mary too much. You can never love her more than Jesus did, and if anyone does not wish to have Mary Immaculate for his mother, he will not have Christ for his brother.”
Loving and honoring Mary leads us to imitate her virtues – her complete self-gift to God, her unwavering “yes.” Through Mary, we deepen our relationship with Jesus, her Son, because she consistently guides our hearts towards Him.
St. Teresa of Calcutta beautifully expresses this desire:
“Mary, Mother of Jesus, give me your heart so beautiful, so pure, so immaculate, so full of love and humility that I may be able to receive Jesus in the Bread of Life, love Him as You loved Him, and serve Him as You served Him….”
Ultimately, Catholic prayer to Mary is not about replacing God, but drawing closer to Him. It’s about seeking the intercession of the woman God Himself chose and honored, the woman who perfectly embodies faith and obedience, and the spiritual mother given to us by Jesus.
