The Netflix series 13 Reasons Why has consistently sparked debate, and its second season was no exception. Central to much of the renewed controversy is a graphic scene in the season finale, often referred to as the “bathroom scene”. This scene depicts the character Tyler, after undergoing a program for troubled teens, being brutally assaulted and raped by Monty with a mop handle.
Initial reactions to the 13 Reasons Why bathroom scene often lean towards shock and disgust. Upon first viewing, many find themselves recoiling from the sheer brutality. However, this visceral reaction is precisely the point. In a season heavily focused on a trial that victim-blamed survivors of Bryce’s sexual assaults – dismissing their experiences based on intoxication, consensual beginnings, or continued affection for their abuser – the bathroom scene serves as a stark and necessary reminder: rape is not about sexual desire; it is fundamentally about power. Monty, a character previously established as overtly homophobic and aggressive, does not sexually assault Tyler due to attraction or rejection. His motive is to inflict humiliation and assert dominance, simply because he can.
This scene’s graphic nature has been a major point of contention, with critics labeling it gratuitously violent and traumatizing. Yet, this criticism ironically misses the crucial point. The reality of sexual violence is often brutal and scarring. Depictions of rape that are softened with artistic cinematography or subtle lighting can inadvertently sanitize the horrific reality of the act. Interestingly, comparisons can be drawn to the rapes of Hannah and Jessica in the first season of 13 Reasons Why. Both Hannah and Tyler are assaulted from behind and forcibly restrained. The camera focuses on their faces, allowing viewers to witness their raw emotional distress and pain. Both scenes are audibly disturbing, emphasizing the violence of the assault. Despite these similarities in depicting female sexual violence in season one, these scenes did not elicit the same level of backlash as the 13 reasons why bathroom scene.
This disparity raises a critical question: why is the depiction of a woman being raped seemingly more acceptable than the portrayal of sexual violence against a male character? Has the prevalence of sexual violence against women led to a desensitization, where the shock value only resurfaces when the victim is male? It forces us to confront why the 13 reasons why bathroom scene evokes such strong disgust, and to question whether we subconsciously perceive male rape as inherently “more horrific” than female rape. Many criticisms have skirted around the central issue by using euphemisms, describing Tyler as being “sodomized.” While technically accurate, such language dilutes the scene’s impact. Tyler was raped. This act of rape was shown on screen, mirroring similar assaults on female characters within the same series, yet provoking a disproportionate level of outrage.
The narrative choices following the 13 reasons why bathroom scene can be debated. However, the scene itself effectively addresses the problematic narratives surrounding rape that precede it in the season. The trial’s focus on Hannah’s sexual history, and the implication that Jessica’s intoxication made her partially responsible for her rape, are examples of victim-blaming tropes the series unfortunately engages with. The 13 reasons why bathroom scene disrupts this skewed narrative by presenting a rape where no action by Tyler could be construed as “justifying” the assault in any way from the viewer’s perspective. This scene powerfully underscores that rape is not about sexual gratification or lust. It is, unequivocally, about power and control – a dynamic that no amount of victim modesty, restraint, or isolation can prevent.
While 13 Reasons Why is undoubtedly a flawed series, and the 13 reasons why bathroom scene does not single-handedly resolve all its issues, dismissing it as unnecessary, overly graphic, or simply disgusting is a disservice. Such reactions inadvertently highlight precisely why the representation of male rape is essential. For prompting this crucial, albeit uncomfortable, dialogue, 13 Reasons Why, specifically through its bathroom scene, deserves recognition.
If you have been affected by any of these issues, please contact Wellbeing Support or Warwick SU Advice Centre.
